I like a boy and I don't like it. I don't like it at all actually. Or maybe I do. I don't know, it definitely depends on the day. Sometimes, I long to have a relationship and be committed to someone. I look at all these happy couples and I feel envious, remembering what love felt like. Then, other days, I see the couples that are miserable together and decide that I don't want someone.
I think the major thing is that I am terrified of opening myself up to someone because I have been in that "happy couple" relationship and ended up becoming part of the "miserable couple." I've dealt with both ends and right now, I don't know if I'm ready to do it again. It's been a year since I was in a real relationship (excluding the small time with James) and since I was head over heels in love. Why am I not ready for something real? Or am I and I'm just scared?
Ugh.. too much to think about on Spring Break. :)
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